Today seems like forever... but really afraid to look ahead

Well this is my dilemma right now. I'm really clueless as to what really the future holds for me. I'm behind for a year, but then I'm happy. I don't know, maybe my maker provided me with overwhelming joy for a week. I answered with 95% certainty my first departmental exam in Advanced Inorganic Chemistry. It seemed as though every moment now has been taking forever. I will still be thankful though if this moment will last forever, but I don't know what the future holds for me. So there's with me the thing called "hidden panic". Maybe that's overwhelming grace. Something I didn't deserve after almost a week of not having a personal, complete, quiet time with the Lord. Maybe a God-shaped hole has started again to form within me. But really, I'm thankful for all the blessings that came to me especially those in disguise, even though during those times I forgot to be thankful. Maybe I wasn't sensitive enough to see them, or really preoccupied with other things. I'm more now of an intercessor; maybe that's where my satisfaction lies... comes along with the whole package of loving my Savior. Maybe I should stop doubting Him & start to press on to the things I really should do. Maybe I should start to come out of my box & really put into action what should be put. Well, that's all for now. Good Evening to you readers...